Good Morning, Robot! ([info]talkbox) wrote,
@ 2005-10-11 17:36:00
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We have nothing to fear but fear itself. Oh, and bird flu.
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Anyone happen to see the cover of USA Today...today?
Well, if not, here's what you missed:
"BIRD FLU: HOW WORRIED SHOULD YOU BE?"

And then they go on to, you know, talk about bird flu (and Spanish flu, and flu in general, and George W. Bush, and just an array of horrible stuff), and blah blah blah, but really, all they needed to put was:

"VERY."

Fuckin' birds. What a bunch of assholes.


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[info]orly_sf
2005-10-11 10:10 pm UTC (link)
omg. I totally have the bird flu. I know you've missed our heart to hearts, but I've been home hacking up a lung falling asleep during movies.

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[info]talkbox
2005-10-12 02:06 pm UTC (link)
I was wondering where you've been. I thought maybe you got lost in a Den of Love. I'm sorry to hear it's actual sickness.

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[info]colleenaf
2005-10-12 01:36 am UTC (link)
Luckily I don't usually have sex with birds (or at least unprotected sex with birds) so that means I'm okay, right?

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[info]talkbox
2005-10-12 02:10 pm UTC (link)
Yes, totally. If you must, use a condom. And no duck hunting. That's about it. I think we're covered.

I'm keeping my windows closed just in case though. There's a pigeon near my office that's been eyeing me suspiciously.

(Just kidding! I don't actually have an office!)

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[info]dollomite
2005-10-12 02:19 pm UTC (link)
Oh god, is that how you get bird flu?

I'm so fucked.

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[info]talkbox
2005-10-12 02:22 pm UTC (link)
Literally!

Ha ha. Oh, lady, lady, lady. WHAT DID I TELL YOU PEOPLE ABOUT SEX WITH BIRDS??! Only on the third date, and only, ONLY, protected! You don't know where those birds have been! Well, the sky, actually. The filthy, dirty, nasty SKY.

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Zing!
[info]dollomite
2005-10-12 02:25 pm UTC (link)
Don't judge me. Why would you assume that we hadn't been out on three dates? Are you saying that I'm easy?

I don't put out for just any backyard bird. This one happens to drive a Hummer.

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Re: Zing!
[info]talkbox
2005-10-12 02:31 pm UTC (link)
I'm not saying you're "easy"! I'm just saying you're "not too difficult." You did it IN the Hummer, didn't you?

Oh, Hummers. So funny.

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Re: Zing!
[info]dollomite
2005-10-12 02:35 pm UTC (link)
Sigh. You know me better than I know myself.

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[info]haldash
2005-10-12 02:17 am UTC (link)
I like birds. They make eggs which is where omelets come from which are delicious.

You read USA Today?

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[info]talkbox
2005-10-12 02:13 pm UTC (link)
Yep, because we have a subscription here at work. Now I also read the Times and the Wall Street Journal. The covers, anyway. Yesterday's Wall Street Journal cover included a story on a woman with Down's Syndrome planning her wedding to a musician with Down's Syndrome. It seemed odd that it was a cover story, but...who am I to judge?

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[info]stellafannyc
2005-10-12 07:05 pm UTC (link)
i woke up this morning, and felt weird. i thought it was just some off kilter phenomenon. turns out,

I HAVE BIRD FLU.

fuck me!

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